“I want to be cheerful and positive. I think that over time, I have hoarded a lot of negative feelings of hatred, pain, fear, jealousy, and anxiety. I want to detox myself of all that…”
“I just want to sleep peacefully for at least 12 hours at a stretch but work pressure and next day’s to-do list just plays in my subconscious mind and I wake up…”
“I want to stay more mindful and also perhaps be more focused on my goals…”
“I wish to wake up early and drink a lot of water. I even set my alarm for it but couldn’t do this simple thing too…”
Can you recognize these lines from somewhere?
These are the statements said by real people trying hard to do something for themselves. Sometimes we also think like that. We do want to show some courage to help ourselves. The only thing we need is a little kick, something to motivate us or can guide us.
Self-love seems to be a very simple term as it consists of two simple words: ‘self’ and ‘love’. Though, It is not so easy to understand. It is not only about loving yourself but loving every part of yourself, accepting how you are, recognizing your strength and weakness, recognizing the love and support you have and then work to be a better version of yourselves. You are not trying to be someone who is loved by all, or to be a perfect person in someone else’s eye but to be a person who loves him/herself, who keeps himself as a priority.
Whether it is a new mother who claims to be experiencing postpartum depression, an unemployed qualified youngster, a girl or boy with broken heart, a person with a difficult childhood, someone facing teenage problems, someone struggling with abusive relationship or someone struggling with loneliness, everyone needs to understand self-love, they need a kick or a plan to help themselves.
I want to share with you all a few pointers which helped me to deal with some similar situations in life. What am I giving you is a 2 week or a 14 days detox map which is the first step to change your life for better. I hope it will give you the most needed kick to your self-love journey;
Before starting this please be sure that you don’t allow anyone, including you, to be judgemental at any place allow yourself to experience what is coming in front of you:
Day 1 – Prepare yourself for the days ahead:
Just buy a journal or a small notebook. Write what you want and what you expect will happen after you complete these steps. Start your first day by taking a pledge to listen to a piece of simple music which can calm you for five minutes. It could be a piece of simple instrumental music, the sound of water waves or anything which could calm you at bedtime and then reflect your day by writing just a few words in your journal. It could be 2 lines or 10 lines. It is totally up to you.
Day 2 – Nature’s love:
During the lockdown, many blamed Covid-19 for making them stay at home at the same time everyone praises how our environment becomes clean. It gives us the chance to appreciate nature even more. After lockdown, we kind of forget it already. It’s time to love our nature again. Just take 15 minutes to walk with nature or just spend those fifteen minutes appreciating nature alone in a park.
Day 3 – Declutter your life:
Marie Kondo, have you heard this name before? I am sure you do. If not I will be leaving a link then. Declutter your closet Marie Kondo way. Even if you manage to reduce it by 25% with the way she suggested, you are good to go. “To put your things in order means to put your past in order, too”
Marie Kondo Way
Day 4 – Show some gratitude:
Be thankful for what you are now and what you get. Appreciate what you have, practice gratitude. Just call any two persons today who care for you and have few words with them and thank them for caring for you.
Day 5 – Color your life your way:
Pickup our forgotten pencils, sheets, colours, chalk, colouring tabs or just a simple pen and paper and be the artist of your own life. Doodle, paint, stamp or do anything to enjoy the colours in your life. You will be amazed to know how this can paint your life with joy.
Day 6 – Stay positive:
Focus on staying positive and tell yourself that the energies are in your favour. Smile, speak politely, approach the situation with a positive attitude, with the belief and confidence that you can do it. If you are having any negative thought engage yourself in another positive activity. Always try to find positive if everything seems negative around you.
Day 7 – Digital detox is a new way:
Although you are getting these steps with the help of digital media only I strongly suggest doing Digital Detox. Just take a one day break and ‘switching off’ is the key here or just lock the stuff somewhere. Instead indulge yourself in real conversations, books or activities. You will notice you have all the time in the world for yourself.
Day 8 – Push your limits:
This is the day when you can push yourself a bit. Just move out of your comfort zone and do something different. Talk to a stranger, have a meal alone in a restaurant, have a difficult talk with someone, or do any one thing which you thought once and denied because of only one reason that you think was hard for you. (P.S.; I am not telling you to jump off any cliff here ;))
Day 9 – Learn to say no:
Have you ever read a book about learning to say no? If yes, great! Re-read it. If no, then even better! Write your own. Just set some boundaries, some limits. Define your parameters and learn to say no beyond that. It could be to your spouse, your children, other family member, friends or even your boss.
Day 10 – Day to reconnect:
Reconnect with one person who was an important part of your life and its foundation but, you have not talked to for since long. It could be your teacher, your school friend, your cousin or anyone.
Day 11 – Smile for yourself, show kindness:
If you want to get rid of anxiety, anger or such negative emotions the key is to smile. To smile the key is to make someone else smile, with one act of kindness. If you can’t think of one just find it on google.
Find a list of kindness acts here
Day 12 – List your favourites:
Make a list of your picks. It could be your fav music, your fav classes, your fav clothes or anything which gives you joy. This will help you to keep yourself sorted.
Day 13 – Do the thing you love, give a treat to yourself:
This is the day to give yourself a little applaud for coming this far. Today is all about you. Your favourite music, your favourite meal, Your fav book, your skincare. You already listed them, just go and treat yourself with your favourites. Yesterday you listed them and today is the day to be in action.
Day 14 – Reflect on what you learnt:
Write to yourself a nice letter about anything you learnt and take a pledge to remember it for your life. This letter will remind you of what you are, in future in case you forget these days. Compare your past to your present and make your future a better one. Don’t compare yourself with others.
Best of luck!!
This post is written as a part of Petals of Love Blog Hop hosted by Swarnali Nath.